I get the Brylane Home Kitchen catalog by mail often, and I always get a kick out of looking at it. Not just because there is cool stuff in it that I want, but I also like to laugh at some of the seriously DUMB stuff in it. These items are what Alton Brown calls *uni-taskers*, because they only do one very specialized thing, something that can often be done by a *multi-tasker*, and therefore are a waste of money and kitchen storage space.
Today I shall be making snarky comments about my picks for the Top 3 Useless Space/Money-Wasting/Uni-Tasking Items in that catalog. It’ll be useful, and much more entertaining than insurance advertising! In no particular order, here they are…
Electric Gravy Warmer – Yeah, it looks real purty, but this is all it does, looking purty on the table and keeping sauces and gravies warm. At almost $30, I think it’s a bit expensive for something that just serves this one purpose.
What would be a better buy – A small, 1.5 quart slow-cooker, such as this one, which sells for more than ten bucks less than the gravy warmer. This Proctor-Silex model has multiple settings, which makes it more versatile. Put it on *keep warm* to use it as a gravy warmer. You can also cook small side dishes, dips, and even use it as a makeshift fondue pot (an idea I stole from Alton himself). As for the tidy little gravy-pouring spout? Well, you really don’t want people picking the thing up and pouring, especially if you’re having Uncle Louie over for Thanksgiving dinner, and he’s been swilling down beers while watching football. A ladle, something that every kitchen has, will work much better!
The Egg Genie – For $20, you can buy this thing that does absolutely NOTHING but cook eggs. And only seven eggs, to boot. If you are making hard-boiled eggs for Easter, you will have to repeat the process several times. But if you use Julia Child’s egg-cooking method, you can cook as many as 24 at a time in one pot. Trust me, it works, I’ve done it many times!
What would be a better buy – A POT, something you probably already have in your kitchen. If you want to spend some money on a high quality multi-tasking pot, how about this Lodge Enameled Cast-Iron Dutch Oven? Not only does it look wicked purty,and will not only cook eggs, but it’s good for so much more. It even can go into the oven. Yeah, it’s $130, but it will last forever. Of course, if you don’t want to spend that much money, any good sized kitchen pot will do for egg cooking.
Jumbo Taco “Bowl” Forms – I love taco salads, when I go to a restaurant that has them, I almost always order them. I even worked at a restaurant that made them, and the taco shell “bowls” were fried. Deep-frying at home can be a royal PITA, plus, you can probably only make one shell at a time that way, in and average pot of oil.
Long before I ever saw anything like this in a catalog, I was baking my own taco shells in the oven. I just lightly sprayed some oven-proof bowls with cooking spray, pressed the tortillas in, and baked for several minutes, until slightly browned around the edges. Came out just fine. When I first saw these things in a catalog, I laughed. I mean, what else can you do with them? Also, for $20, you only get two, with regular bowls, you can have more than that in the oven at the same time.
What would be a better buy – Good old Corelle Livingware, that’s what! This stuff is microwave safe, oven safe, and even if you throw it at someone who was dumb enough to spend money on any of the dumb crap in this article, it still won’t break. The soup/cereal bowls that come with the basic sets are what I use when I want to make taco bowl shells. And not only can you also use them for, well, soup and cereal, but for food storage, as well. They make plastic snap-on lids that fit varying sizes of Corelle bowls, they can be found at stores that sell Corelle open stock. I bought mine on the cheap at the Corningware/Corelle/Revere Outlet store in Kittery, Maine. This gives even more added value to these already versatile bowls!
Finally, a confession…I know that I can shape my own sliders and cook them in a regular frying pan, but I sort of want this Slider Station thingy. The late Billy Mays used to hawk them on TV, and I sort of thought they were cool. Maybe I’ll plunk down the $12.99 for one, it IS on clearance, after all!
Or maybe not.
